...For a Security Guard...

So clearly Hans Spared no expense when it came to equipping his team with state-of-the-art hardware. A giant drill, rocket launcher, metal-cutting chainsaw, and last but not least, a bunch of hockey puck grenades. I, for one have never seen such a device, so I don't actually know what the hell it is. But it's sweet, right? Well, kind of, anyway. I still can't figure out what it actually does.

We're introduced to Karl's little toy during the opening seconds of the Nakatomi takeover. We know right off the bat that he's an excellent shot, as he tags that desk clerk between the eyes at point blank range. Then when he goes after guard number two, the stakes go up. Recall if you will, the 80's pornstar looking security guard who's enjoying a smoke break over by the elevators. Best I can tell, he was distracted, unarmed, and completely harmless. You'd think Karl would want to make it quick and easy. But, I suppose that if you dissect the name of this film, a couple gunshots just doesn't cut it sometimes. No, Karl chose to utilize one of his little flashbangs just to make sure this guy's last seconds on earth were spent in annoyance in confusion. Overkill is the name of the game, I suppose. And while the rest of the guys were on their way upstairs to crash the office Christmas Party, I guess he figured that 31 hostages wouldn't be much more effective than an even 30.

In retrospect, it could have been a simple weapons test. Maybe he didn't know what it was going to do, and didn't have time to test it on the neighbor's cat before taking off for the Nakatomi heist. Even if it turned out to be an ACTUAL hockey puck that didn't actually do anything, he still had his trusty pistol as a backup. Whatever the case, he was clearly satisfied with the results. When Karl and Hans have McClane pinned down in a sea of broken glass, he uses it again with even less of an effect. At least the security guard threw his hands up and squinted slightly, making for an easy kill. All it really did to McClane was made him run a little faster.

Perhaps, if Karl had survived to see Die Hard 2, he would have graduated to ACTUAL grenades. They might not have the same hypnotizing roll or sliding capabilities, but they get the job done. Shit, even a Molotov Cocktail will usually at least knock a guy down.